Month: November 2014

Incident Fourteen: The Online Blog

In the time Mr Weirdo and I dated, the world of social media was vastly expanding. Facebook was still in the early stages and hadn’t quite caught on yet, MySpace and Bebo were the ones people were using most. Twitter was a distant nightmare.
I was on social media quite often writing to friends and posting selfies. Mr Weirdo resisted setting an account up until I begged and pleaded. When he did, however, because he had so few friends he had nobody to interact with.
So he began writing a strange long diary on there that nobody would read except him.

The site he used has since shut down but I saved a copy of the diary just before it did.

I’m sure previous blog entries have already shown what kind of person he is, but here are some gems straight from the horses mouth:

** I have changed names of people and places for confidentiality**

“I’m a bit worried about most everything, things seem very much out of place at the moment, I need to talk to someone. Well what I need is some kind of etheral being to read my thoughts and to guide me, no-one seems to be around to guide me anymore, I am alone in the matter.”

” You know what, I went to sleep yesterday when everyone else was asleep and I swear I saw a ghost, a small spectre which was staring at me, its head shook and vibrated quickly then it changed faces and it was doing it faster and faster so I turned the lights on. After this I was haunted by another shadow glaring and again it went, thirdly it was a lady wearing nothing IO saw appear in my sheets before I slept with the light on all night. I’ve never felt so scared, well not for a while.
I feel pretty scared and very very cold, I think I will get a jumper about now”

“Well yes I’m feeling down, I think I’m gonig to struggle to make it if I don’t see Scorned Woman #2 for too long. She may not be able to see me but I think I’m going to have to beg to see her at least Sunday or something if not Saturday… That could work, she could come Sunday and go home Monday back to her university for lectures. Gah, I’m soo fucking selfish”

** I had seen him two days before, and bear in mind I was the only person following him on social media. Would it not have been easier just to message and ask to hang out?

“Hey been a while since updating, but guess what I got no friends so I got enoguh time to do as such . Actually I got a few girls who pity me in farness […] I just can’t socialise, I can make enemies and annoy people without trying”

 

“Yikes {bewildered and worried facial expressions from the crowd (or not)}, just come to my attention that I’m actually really not very popular . Not sure how to treat that really.”

** Might help if you stopped being such a twat?

“My mum doesn’t trust me in that she asks my sister and brother to find out how far I’m getting and if I’m stupid enough to get a Scorned Woman #2 pregnant.”

“I feel good right now, grinning like some genetically mutated Cheshire Cat… Oh phooey (as Donald Duck would say).”

“I’ve come along way, over the years. I’ve climbed out of my own essence, I’ve become something powerful I think. Yet still its not in its prime. This is a random mumble about a memory. It is a memory of what once was.”

“It’s been so long since I last prayed. Not to God but to the God, not a God, not a known God but the God I know who keeps me company. Me I guess, do I pray to myself?”

“Maybe its a more femine trait, being concerned so much about what you look like and how you approach situations, aren’t men meant to go in much more all guns blazing style? Mayhaps I am a mere coward. Or maybe even more strange I am slowly becoming a woman.”

“Trust me when I tell you this but alcohol, food and even playstation and Personal Computer is no substitute for friendships.”

There is also a worrying amount of times he just refers to me as Girl. It wasn’t a nickname, and never “The Girl” which seems a bit sweeter. But literally like, “Girl, you need to get your work done so you can see me” or “Girl is sad today”. It’s like when aliens in movies try to be human.

He kept up this strange diary up until the last year or so of the relationship. We rarely spoke about it.

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